The dooloop Dictionary of Dog Poop Puns

Mar 6, 2023

When I invented the dooloop and found myself in the poop business, I immediately realized that the best way to take the ‘gross’ out of picking up dog feces was to make it funny. We’re trying to solve a serious problem, here. Pooch poop isn’t just unsightly, it spreads parasites, pollutes waterways, and can hurt native species. Hopefully, if we wrap up some of these unsavory ideas in wit, together we can get other people talking about easy ways to take care of sh*t!

So, here we go! Puns, rhymes, alliteration, palindromes, and ambigrams: here’s a dictionary of puns and fun nonsense words that you can use to turn your ‘potty mouth’ to a good purpose: Helping teach others to pick up after their pooch!

The language of poop is pun!

Nothing brings out your inner kid like a good fart or poo joke. When we were little, politeness often required that we use pseudonyms like ‘number 1 or number 2,’ or ‘big jobs and little jobs’ when we referred to bathroom activity. ‘Poop!’ was (and often still is) a preschooler’s first daringly enjoyed ‘bad word,’ followed by gales of giggles. I guess it's no surprise that poop jokes have followed us into adulthood. Bodily functions are generally joked about, probably because they can also be a source of social embarrassment. Who hasn’t pungently ‘odorized’ a guest bathroom? (Poo-pourri has a hysterical commercial for this – just Google!). Lots of us have had to sheepishly bag up our dog’s ‘curtsy outfall’ after they dropped their doo right on the neighbor’s pristine grass. What better way to defuse an awkward situation than by making a joke about a problem we all share?

A good pun, my English teacher announced, is the ‘lowest form of humor.’ I disagree. If puns are clever and make people smile or do a double take, they serve a higher purpose. Here are just a few examples. Can you add to them?

Poonami - A tsunami of dog poop.
Poopsicle - Frozen dog poop.
Poopocalypse - A catastrophic amount of poop!
Poodunit - Who left that pile of poop or that pool of piddle?
Shoe poo - Poop on your shoe that goes unnoticed until the smell invades your home or car.
Potty-mouth - A dog who finds cat or dog ‘tootsie rolls’ tasty! No kisses please!
Turd-ler – A dog who sneakily poops inside (versus an untrained puppy).

How about giving that familiar daily dump a punny new twist? Your pup is outside:

Dealing a deuce
Doing their dooty,
On a ‘dooty call’
Dropping a biscuit
Out finding magnetic north (dogs poop aligned to magnetic north; who knew?)
Un-loading
Doing their business
Meeting ‘loo’
Doing their daily bum salutation

Channel your inner poo-et

There are 492 words that rhyme with poop according to RhymeZone, so it would be almost embarrassing if we didn’t take advantage of the bounty! 'Dog log,' 'shoe poo,' and 'turd is the word,' spring to mind, along with quite a few that are less acceptable for polite company.

Anyone can be a poo-et if you don't mind being a bit cheeky. Looking for a way to make light of having to clean up your sick pup's diarrhea? ‘Poop soup’’ perfectly describes the ick. We titled a recent article ‘Dog Bum 101‘ because it perfectly described the article and is simply fun to say. Aren’t we all looking for more silliness and joy these days?

Don’t litter – alliterate instead!

Many companies use the same first letter sounds over and over in their marketing because it’s catchy. We can't help but alliterate poop references, too, like 'bum biscuit,' or 'dropping a deuce.' ‘Pooch,’ ‘puppy,’ ‘pet’ and ‘pup’ are biologically and alliteratively tied to so many great words! Who hasn’t gone out on poop patrol, or been a party pooper?

With dooloop marketing, we’re also blessed with a plethora of words that also have assonance (sound alike). We can ask ‘do you scoop poop, and loop?’ There are endless the opportunities to turn a phrase and have fun.

Nonsense words are poopedy-ickedy!

Why not just make up words? Dr. Seuss did, and it worked for him! If, like me, you simply don’t like the sound of abrupt words like crap, turd, excrement, or bowel movement (ewww), then just make up your own. Do you have any silly terms you use when dooty calls your little stinker? We’d love to hear them! Here are some from our pet community:

Stink nuggets - This speaks for itself, right?
Dingleberries - Those little bits of poop that get stuck on your pup's fluffy butt
Dookie-doo - The cute little round poops
Crop-dusting - when your dog squat-scootches all around the yard, dropping nuggets

Get creative and swap in different words and phrases to replace the dirty deed. If you must write about cleaning your dog’s rear end, a ‘rectal reconnaissance mission’ sounds like an adventure. ‘Tushy,’ ‘bum’, or ‘hiney’ soften the nomenclature. We call our Bella’s bum, her ‘bus’. She’s an unrepentant butt girl. Rub her ears and before you know it, she’ll turn and ‘back her bus’ right onto your lap!

Po(o)p quiz! What is a ambigram?

Don't worry -- we're not grading.

‘Poop’ is a palindrome: a word that is spelled the same both forwards and backwards.
‘Dog’ spells ‘god’ when reversed – and that’s called a semordnilap (palindrome spelled backwards)!
And the word ‘dooloop’ is an ambigram – if you turn ‘dooloop’ upside down, it still reads ‘dooloop!’

These are fun facts to throw in when you're teaching kids that loving their dog means picking up their poop, too. Showing kids how a poop bag keeps their hands cootie-free, teaching the importance of picking up, and how a nifty dooloop carries the ‘load,’ will help get them through the major yick-factor of hand-scooping poop. And if that doesn't work, just give them all these puns and jokes to play with. NO kid can resist a poop joke!

It's easy to ‘have an accident’ when talking about poop

Just this week I was talking to my display designer about marketing images, and I heard myself saying “I need a bigger poop, and could we make it happier too?” You can’t help but stumble into silliness, even in serious discussions about poop. However, I do want to guarantee you that here on the dooloop team, you’ll never hear us s#*t-talking others or spreading crap information. This is a no-bullshit zone. As punny as poop is, we need to protect the environment and help build dog-friendly communities by picking up after our pups.

Do you have a favorite poo pun? Let’s keep adding words and phrases to the list! Scroll on down to the very bottom of thedooloop.com and shoot me a message, and remember to pick up those bum biscuits. Spread Peace, not Poop.